So... I have neglected to write about last week, but every time I think about it I just get discouraged. I haven't done anything I shouldn't have done (no smoking, reasonably healthy eating, have not murdered anyone) but I have been... depressed? I know that what I am going through is physical, but I have been experiencing the withdrawal from nicotine as a deep sadness. I feel less like myself- there are all kinds of decisions that need to be made and somehow I have not felt up to making them. I need to either quit my gym OR make another appointment with my trainer; if I quit my gym I need to join another one, immediately. I badly want to quit Bally's (although I like my trainer, I don't think I can keep him) but I haven't felt up to the change. Where has all my gumption gone?
I am hoping it will pass quickly. I wore my last patch on Thursday and it's Sunday night- there has to be a light at the end of the tunnel, right? There just has to be.
So big love to all my Spark and online friends who have checked in with me- I am fine, just cranky as blazes and hiding my face until I feel a little better.